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SITE HAS BEEN MOVED!
PLEASE GO TO
HTTP://PALACE.VERYWEIRD.COM
THERE WILL NO LONGER BE UPDATES POSTED HERE!
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jan 24.01
Music News
the first release of RNTP's "Purgatory" is now
available for download at MP3.com.
i will have it available here for download as soon as i can get
it uploaded. congratulations to the band!
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jan 23.01
British
Court Says 'Internet twins' To Stay Temporarily In Authorities'
Care after the last two weeks, i really
thought i'd seen it all, but...i was wrong. now we've got
people adopting babies over
the internet, and then it turns out that there were other
families that paid money to adopt the same babies, and to make
it even more fun, now the trailer
dwelling mother wants the kids back after only a few months.
hold on while i digest this...
can this world get any weirder? i guess what they say is
true, you can
sell anything on the internet. next thing you know
people will be lobbing their
infants up on ebay when the water bill comes
due.
i can see it now "3 MONTH OLD, BLONDE, BROWNE EYE, LOW
RESERVE"...click on the link
"you're bidding on an almost brand new blonde haired, brown
eyed infant, only used for aprox. 3 months. STILL SMELLS
LIKE NEW!!! this is a great little piece for any collector.
there are no scratches or noticeable markings. i liked
this model, but just got a newer one from my uncle for Christmas,
and it seems to be working a little better for me in the
backend. the reserve is LOW and bidder will pay $36
shipping for priority mail. infant will be shipped
with original packaging, but no manuals"
well, this gives me an idea, i've got some small squirrel bones
that i've fashioned into weapons, maybe i could sell them on
ebay. but instead of having a Dutch auction, i'd have a "Ray
Carruth" auction, which means, anyone dumb enough to
send me money for squirrel bones, will have their car blocked in
by me and i'll have a hired gunman take them out for being
stupid.
but now that i think about it....if'n i run out of squirrels to
eat, and now ebay's sellin babies.......
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jan 22.01
well, this weekend was full of interesting lessons.
lesson one: i decided, for something different to try to smoke a
squirrel. once i got his tail to stay light, it was a
tough draw, but a smooth smoke
lesson two: i learned that with a small piece of squirrel ribeye,
i could lure the big black cat next door close enough to the
window to grab.
bottom line....I ATE GOOD THIS WEEKEND!!!
now i know, there's cat lovers out there reading that would say
"that's horrible that he would kill a large black cat to
eat." well, my well calculated response to that
is....bite me! i was hungry!
plus, what else was i gonna do, the donut shop was
closed.....read on....
---------------------
HOLD THE PHONE!!!! the donut shop is closing for a
week. well, if i had to sum up my thoughts about this
making the newspaper into one word, that one word would have to be...
WHO @#$%ING CARES???
in a country that has just sworn in a new president, the stock
market is at best unpredictable, and the most important thing
this lady could find to write about is the trauma of local citizens
over a donut shop closing for a week.
now, don't get me wrong, i believe one of the finest things in
the world is a nice glazed donut with no cracks in the
glaze. but then again, i also believe
that gravity is just i nice idea. and i also believe
that Sam Kinison (God rest his soul) was one of the world's
foremost comedic geniuses. and believe me, after you've
been eating squirrels for a couple of weeks, a little glazed
donut sounds pretty darn good. but i just can't understand
wasting good newspaper space over a donut shop. but, to
their credit, i've read their paper, and it was really one of
the more interesting things they've published in a while.
(remember the article about the teacher suing the school
district for $16, man i can sure pick em)
maybe next week she could write about the genocide taking place
against the squirrel community. or, maybe she could cover
the traumatic closing of the men's room at the local pizza
shack, because the locks are broken...again. now
that's riveting journalism.
and the worst part is, i can't decide which is worse, the fact
that they published this piece of crap, or that i wasted time,
not only reading it, but writing about it here.
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ANNOUNCING
the opening of a new site of a twisted friend of mine.
as of this past weekend The
Dogg Pound was opened for business by "The Skinny
Kid". now for the disclaimer, the views expressed on
the sites linked to from here, are not the views or opinions of
the management of the palace, but some of them are darn
funny. best of luck to ya Skinny Kid.
also, Midwest
Lanes in Glenwood, IA, just opened their new site this past
week as well. this site was designed by co-owner Bill Cap,
and if i may say so, he did a mighty fine job with it.
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Music News
this is a palace EXCLUSIVE!
Rusty Needle Tatoo Parlor's new album is coming along
quite well. over the weekend i had the distinct pleasure
of hearing a couple of the tracks off the disk, and it didn't
suck.
unfortunately, my favorite track may not make the final cut, and
that was a little screwin around track where they did a little
rap version of Manic
Jester, with just bass and drums. they have also started to
post their music on napster.
there are still a couple of tracks left to do, including Splitline.
Samples from the CD will be available for download here at the
palace soon
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jan 19.01
Music News
SAD BUT
TRUE
it is with sadness that i must report that it
was announced today that Jason Newsted has announced that after
14 years of greatness, he is leaving long time legend Metallica.
his intensity in not only his stage performance but also in the
way he played his music will be greatly missed.
read
the full story...
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Ex-CIA
Director Day Plead Guilty To Misdemeanor
surely you jest. can this really be a true story?
a man works for the government, illegally takes information home
to his unsecured computer which is hooked to the internet, and
he's going to get away with pleading to a
misdemeanor?
"Provisions of U.S. laws on
espionage make the willful mishandling of classified defense
information a felony punishable by up to 10 years in prison.
Taking classified information home without authorization is a
misdemeanor punishable by up to one year in prison"
now can you tell me what the difference is? wouldn't
taking classified
info home without authorization somehow qualify as WILLFUL
MISHANDLING?
you know what would happen to me if i had some classified
documents on my machine here at home? they'd kick my door
open, and haul my
little redneck butt to prison. but...luckily for me,
they'd have to be able to get to the basement, where i'm locked,
and i have some squirrel bones that i've fashioned into small
weapons, and they'd have themselves a bit of a spat on their
hands. i've been practicing, i can take a flee off a
squirrel's back at 15 yards.
i just don't understand how these people who we charge with the security
of our country, can break all of the rules, jeopardize this safety
of this great country, and then expect not to be
prosecuted.
i suppose it's just yet another example of how the rich in
this country are only expected to follow the laws that they find
to be in their best interests.
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